Outrage has erupted online over a study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine last month that claimed there is a difference between female ejaculate (which comes from the Skene's gland through the vagina) and squirting, which the study claims is just pee.
Thousands of tweets have flooded Twitter with the hashtag #NotPee, saying that the study shames women for enjoying orgasms — something many women are already made to feel self-conscious about. The hashtag was started by sex toy critic Epiphora after she wrote an in-depth blog post on the topic.
Blogger Kayla Lords also responded to the study:
"As I have said many, many times, my first orgasm didn't happen until I was 32. Sure, part of it was fear of giving up control (I got over that pretty well, huh?), but the biggest reason was because I'm a squirter. Except I didn't know it at the time. The sensation I get right before I squirt is similar to needing to pee. Because I didn't know about squirting and I'd never explored my body, I held back any and all climaxes because I was terrified of peeing on my partner, myself, and the bed.
The night I finally relaxed enough and came in a big, gushy orgasm, I stressed myself out making sure I hadn't just pissed everywhere. My sheets were white — the wet spot was definitely there, but not yellow in any, way, shape, or form. The smell was tangy and sharp, but nothing like urine (says the mom of two little boys with bad aim — I am very familiar with the smell of pee). The hardest part was the taste-test. Sure, I was alone. Sure, I never had to tell anyone about it if it was pee. But I still trembled, blushed, and looked around (in an empty room) in shame, but I had to know. NOT pee."
Women across the Internet chimed in with similar stories — of being afraid and embarrassed of their orgasms, of finally learning to let go and enjoy themselves, of knowing from lifetimes of experience that squirting is not peeing.
Last night, Dr. Drew addressed the controversy on his show, where he acknowledged that some women can have "female orgasmic incontinence," which causes those women to pee during sex. But he also pointed out that women do ejaculate separately from this from the Skene's gland, like the study claimed. So ... basically he backed up the study.
The biggest problem with the study that many people are pointing out is how small the sample size was — only seven people were studied. SEVEN. It's very possible those seven women had what Dr. Drew calls "female orgasmic incontinence." Or, even if they didn't, their reactions to orgasm are not representative of, you know, all women. Until we have a more reliable study on the female orgasm, we'll just have to go on believing that women orgasm glitter and joy, and forget all about pee-gate.
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Emma Barker edits longform reporting at Cosmopolitan. She lives with her husband in Brooklyn, NY.
